I lost 2.2 pounds last week, a lot better than the previous week, so I am content. I told myself that I won't stress, because I know that in the end stress will only exacerbate the issue. I took a small LOA from the gym for about 5 days and tried to focus on at home activity and eating healthily and that seemed to help a little. I want to try to make an effort to go earlier in the day and have adequate time to rest in the evenings before bed. I'm hoping that switching my schedule up a bit will help get things moving again. My washer and dryer finally came Sunday and I'm happy to report 90% of my laundry is done and I only have a few things left to put away. I am going to work on cleaning out my closets sometime this summer, but I'd really like to lose another 20lbs before I decide what stays and what goes. I am at that point where everything kind of fits, but not much looks perfect yet, so I don't want to give anything up that I really like until I'm sure it's too big.
I have not really been reading blogs this week, so I apologize for lack of commenting. I am experimenting with using the laptop less and working on more projects to keep my energy levels up. I started taking some new supplements as well to see if I get any benefit from them. I am doing sub lingual B-12 daily and a "weight loss" supplement- which is basically glorified vitamins. I also scheduled an appointment with my doctor for next Thursday for a weight loss consultation. I have never actually went to a DR for this purpose in the past, but I figure why not? If they run some tests and figure out that I have a deficiency or thyroid issue, etc. then at least I'll know why things aren't going as smoothly this time around. I figure I'll just get the standard lecture about getting older or some BS, but if I ignore the apathy I'll be able to handle it. I just HATE when DR's act like they KNOW your body. Yeah, you might have a medical degree, but you aren't living inside of me and you don't know how I feel.
I also made an appointment that I have been thinking about for a very long time. I scheduled a consult with a cosmetic dentists about my "misaligned tooth" or lovingly called my "alligator tooth". It might me hard to see in my pictures, but one of my my maxillary lateral incisors protrudes and is farther up in my gum than the rest of my teeth. I should have gotten braces as a child, but by the time my parents could afford it (and they really couldn't anyway) I was in high school and scoffed at having a mouth full of metal. It was bad enough being 270lbs without dental hardware. It's hard to see in pictures dead center, but from the side it's ugly. I hate seeing myself in profile or a camera angle from underneath. I don't really want to get braces, invisalign or standard because I think they would be a bullshit hassle and still too expensive as my insurance only covers $1800 lifetime for them. I want to find out all my options, remove it and replace it with a porcelain tooth? A bridge, a crown, a veneer? I have not idea what can be done, but I know I want whats best for my health and my wallet. Anyway, that's on the 30th, so I will let you all know how it goes. Gotta run for now, good luck everyone!
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Monday, April 16, 2012
Weekly Weigh In 4
This week has been rather disappointing... I only lost .6 pounds and I'm still doing everything right. I know we've all been there and my bitching and moaning isn't going to make it any better. I just don't understand! Now I am 4 whole pounds behind my goal weight for the duration, 4 pounds is quite a hefty bit to make up! I calculated things out and if from here on out I manage to lose 2 pounds a week I can make my ultimate goal before Halloween, but I really wanted to make it about 3 or 4 weeks sooner in time for DH's homecoming. I am thinking about making some changes, but I really don't know what to do. I feel like I'm doing everything right and am doing exactly what I have done in the past that has been so successful. I did take my new measurements (available on Weight Stats page) and have lost some inches, but I still don't feel much smaller. Maybe I should explore other diets? I just don't want to waste any time acclimating my body to a new set of rules and losing precious time to "lose".
As of this morning the carpet guys have came back a second time and all there is left is to clean it. They laid a new layer of cement where the sub-floor was crumbling and replaced the tack strip and re stretched the carpet. I have started running the air conditioner now, so we'll see in a few weeks if any mold has started growing again.
It's about 3 in the afternoon now and I do have a lot of errands I need to run, including heading to the gym. I need to go to the bank and deposit/transfer some money, go to the post office and mail a care package, go to the store an buy some goodies for the next care package, meet my friend to drop off my car at the shop, *clean my car out before then, and then go work out. I feel like my days are either filled to the brim or completely empty. Today is definitely a full day and I should really get moving.
As of this morning the carpet guys have came back a second time and all there is left is to clean it. They laid a new layer of cement where the sub-floor was crumbling and replaced the tack strip and re stretched the carpet. I have started running the air conditioner now, so we'll see in a few weeks if any mold has started growing again.
It's about 3 in the afternoon now and I do have a lot of errands I need to run, including heading to the gym. I need to go to the bank and deposit/transfer some money, go to the post office and mail a care package, go to the store an buy some goodies for the next care package, meet my friend to drop off my car at the shop, *clean my car out before then, and then go work out. I feel like my days are either filled to the brim or completely empty. Today is definitely a full day and I should really get moving.
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Frustration & Mold!
Extreme frustration is my new name! I am so irritated right now and I don't know what to do! To start my biggest frustration is between myself and my housing community. Basically our entire area military housing system (which is privatized) has been under scrutiny for poor handling when it comes to maintenance practices, including many reports of mold that is going untreated. All the stories reminded me of when we first moved in here and my back door wouldn't secure properly. It is a double door that has a blot lock between them, well in a big storm the doors would blow open due to them not being secured into the frame well. I woke up one morning to the doors wide open and the curtains and carpet soaked with rain. I called maintenance to come fix the door (which took them 2 days) and the guy said, "Well there's really not much we can do about this..." and then banged the top locks into the frame with a screwdriver. REALLY? Could you not have installed a cross lock on the inside or something? The door still gets jiggly now and then so I still have to go back in and fix it myself. They never asked me about the water damage or seemed to care and after we fan dried it, I didn't think much else about it.
In light of the new mold accusations, I decided to do some investigating around my home to see if there was anything apparent. I found a big moldy stain in my HVAC closet on the aluminum backed paper and a water stain around it, but it appeared dry. I also pulled up the carpet near the patio doors and found the carpet discolored underneath and the wooden tack strips blackened (moldy) with water damage. I took pictures and went to my local housing office to request a mold test and have the problem taken care of. The lady was nice, but explained I could treat it, then test or test it, then treat. It made more sense to treat, then test, that way I'd know that the problem was taken care of. A maintenance worker came over within half an hour to look at the damage. He used a moisture probe in the HVAC (while I watched) and said that it came back at 1% which is normal for all walls. The thing is, and I don't know how these things work, when he first put the probe into the area it jumped around 30-40% and then as he moved it, it went to 1%. I thought that was odd, but figured he knows what he's doing. He tells me it must be an old leak and isn't leaking now, so when I start using the air conditioner regularly I should keep and eye on it. He sprays over it with white paint called "Killz" which is supposed to kill mold and then looks at the carpet. Same song and dance, then tells me it's not wet now, so... and basically seems like the blackened wood isn't a big deal. I ask if he's gonna replace it and he's like, we can. He tells me he'll be back tomorrow to pull it up and leave it for a carpet guy to come in and replace. I ask if the carpet can be assessed or cleaned since it's discolored and he says he'll let them know I'd like that. He leaves and I feel kind of ignored in a way. HE was TOTALLY nice, but I just didn't feel like the "treatment" was effective. IMHO, I think that a leak doesn't just cure itself and that some investigative work should have been done in the HVAC to see where it came from. Maybe it rotted a hole somewhere else and how now rerouted to an unknown location? Maybe there is an overgrowth of mold inside the duct that the handy dandy "white cover up" killz spray could not reach? The carpeting, I think should at least be completely removed from that section (about 3sq feet) and replaced, I mean there is a line of black shit on the underside where the boards met the carpet... FRUSTRATION!
SO, the next day comes and I had to work, as it seems I always do when maintenance needs to come by, and when I get home I see that nothing has been done. WTF? Guess they got too busy and I figure they'll show Monday. Monday morning I get a phone call from the maintenance office to do a satisfaction survey on my recent call, I tell the lady, "No, the work isn't done and I already asked to not be contacted by phone because they call too damn early and to only contact me by email. I try to go back to sleep, but my peaceful dreamings have been interrupted and it's no use. That evening a guy comes at about 5:15 (they close up shop by 5:30-6) and says he is there to check the HVAC to see if anything new has occurred. Well of course not, because you painted over it and mold doesn't grow overnight like that. I ask about the carpet, he has no idea and says he will talk to someone. I am still frustrated, but it's late and there is no one to talk to about it, so whatever. Tuesday (today) I had a lot to do and ended up staying awake until nearly 6AM doing a last minute favor for a friend. I crawl into bed praying for a good nights sleep, they last few nights when I did actually get enough sleep my weight dropped and dropped and I was getting giddy with the realization that as long as I got 8 to 9 hours of uninterrupted sleep, my body rewarded me! At 9AM I get another call from maintenance asking how my service was on my water intrusion problem, I tell the girl that I just told them yesterday to NOT call, only email and that it was a bad time. She apologized and said they would try again later. (NOTE: IF they call again I'm removing my number and then they call dial the wall for all I care) About 20 minutes later as I am just about to be asleep again, the doorbell rings. FUCK! I am sleeping on the couch and I yell "JUST A MINUTE", check the peephole and it's obviously someone with maintenance. I run to the room to put on clothes (yes, I sleep semi-nude) and by time I get back they are gone, completely gone. I am pissed, they HAD HAD HAD to have heard me. I call the resident office trying to figure out who it was and what they wanted. To make a really long story a little shorter, after a few calls they figure out it was the carpet contractor come to look at my carpet and assess what needed to be done. I tell her to tell them to come back, that I'll be waiting. They show about 10 minutes later and decide they need to put in some concrete filler, then replace the tack and re stretch the carpet. Then they'll have it cleaned. I say great, when? We decide on Thursday, because I said I had to work Friday and they leave. Not five minutes later, I realize that it's actually Thursday I work and not Friday. I call the resident office yet again and tell them to contact these guys and let them know that I actually need them come Friday. By this time I am wide awake and pissed. I checked my weight and it was up a pound and a half from yesterday!
I am SO SICK and TIRED of having people do this! They call at all hours, work their own schedules, and have little to no consideration for their residents. And worst of all, my weight is suffering for it. I was too tired for the gym yesterday and I am too tired today. I actually fell asleep from 1:30pm to about 5pm, so now I 'll probably be up all night again. I don't know what to do. I can't turn my phone off at night with DH overseas, what if it's an emergency? I also called the store about my washer and dryer delivery, I was told it could be up to 3 weeks and today was 3 weeks with no word. The guy I talk to says he doesn't see anything about it coming in and tells me they should have told me 6 to 8 weeks. WTF? 6 to 8 weeks to have a washer and dryer sent in? How in the hell, why in the hell, would it take that long? I was told a special order clerk would call me back about it today, but no one has, so I guess I'll be calling to bitch again tomorrow. I might just go up there and God almighty if the ones I ordered are in stock, I gonna MAKE them give whatever they have and when mine comes in it's theirs.
It' like 6pm now and I know that I need to go to them gym, I really have to. I need to be home by 8pm to catch the biggest loser (it's about the only show that I'm looking forward to these days and I HATE that they made it an hour shorter to have the stoooopid The Voice results show) until 9pm, then I should should go to the other gym, but I don't know if I have the strength today. I should try to be asleep by 12 or 1 tops too. I felt good to get that all out, but I feel like it's not going to solve any of my problems. Thanks for letting my rant! Dios Mio!
In light of the new mold accusations, I decided to do some investigating around my home to see if there was anything apparent. I found a big moldy stain in my HVAC closet on the aluminum backed paper and a water stain around it, but it appeared dry. I also pulled up the carpet near the patio doors and found the carpet discolored underneath and the wooden tack strips blackened (moldy) with water damage. I took pictures and went to my local housing office to request a mold test and have the problem taken care of. The lady was nice, but explained I could treat it, then test or test it, then treat. It made more sense to treat, then test, that way I'd know that the problem was taken care of. A maintenance worker came over within half an hour to look at the damage. He used a moisture probe in the HVAC (while I watched) and said that it came back at 1% which is normal for all walls. The thing is, and I don't know how these things work, when he first put the probe into the area it jumped around 30-40% and then as he moved it, it went to 1%. I thought that was odd, but figured he knows what he's doing. He tells me it must be an old leak and isn't leaking now, so when I start using the air conditioner regularly I should keep and eye on it. He sprays over it with white paint called "Killz" which is supposed to kill mold and then looks at the carpet. Same song and dance, then tells me it's not wet now, so... and basically seems like the blackened wood isn't a big deal. I ask if he's gonna replace it and he's like, we can. He tells me he'll be back tomorrow to pull it up and leave it for a carpet guy to come in and replace. I ask if the carpet can be assessed or cleaned since it's discolored and he says he'll let them know I'd like that. He leaves and I feel kind of ignored in a way. HE was TOTALLY nice, but I just didn't feel like the "treatment" was effective. IMHO, I think that a leak doesn't just cure itself and that some investigative work should have been done in the HVAC to see where it came from. Maybe it rotted a hole somewhere else and how now rerouted to an unknown location? Maybe there is an overgrowth of mold inside the duct that the handy dandy "white cover up" killz spray could not reach? The carpeting, I think should at least be completely removed from that section (about 3sq feet) and replaced, I mean there is a line of black shit on the underside where the boards met the carpet... FRUSTRATION!
SO, the next day comes and I had to work, as it seems I always do when maintenance needs to come by, and when I get home I see that nothing has been done. WTF? Guess they got too busy and I figure they'll show Monday. Monday morning I get a phone call from the maintenance office to do a satisfaction survey on my recent call, I tell the lady, "No, the work isn't done and I already asked to not be contacted by phone because they call too damn early and to only contact me by email. I try to go back to sleep, but my peaceful dreamings have been interrupted and it's no use. That evening a guy comes at about 5:15 (they close up shop by 5:30-6) and says he is there to check the HVAC to see if anything new has occurred. Well of course not, because you painted over it and mold doesn't grow overnight like that. I ask about the carpet, he has no idea and says he will talk to someone. I am still frustrated, but it's late and there is no one to talk to about it, so whatever. Tuesday (today) I had a lot to do and ended up staying awake until nearly 6AM doing a last minute favor for a friend. I crawl into bed praying for a good nights sleep, they last few nights when I did actually get enough sleep my weight dropped and dropped and I was getting giddy with the realization that as long as I got 8 to 9 hours of uninterrupted sleep, my body rewarded me! At 9AM I get another call from maintenance asking how my service was on my water intrusion problem, I tell the girl that I just told them yesterday to NOT call, only email and that it was a bad time. She apologized and said they would try again later. (NOTE: IF they call again I'm removing my number and then they call dial the wall for all I care) About 20 minutes later as I am just about to be asleep again, the doorbell rings. FUCK! I am sleeping on the couch and I yell "JUST A MINUTE", check the peephole and it's obviously someone with maintenance. I run to the room to put on clothes (yes, I sleep semi-nude) and by time I get back they are gone, completely gone. I am pissed, they HAD HAD HAD to have heard me. I call the resident office trying to figure out who it was and what they wanted. To make a really long story a little shorter, after a few calls they figure out it was the carpet contractor come to look at my carpet and assess what needed to be done. I tell her to tell them to come back, that I'll be waiting. They show about 10 minutes later and decide they need to put in some concrete filler, then replace the tack and re stretch the carpet. Then they'll have it cleaned. I say great, when? We decide on Thursday, because I said I had to work Friday and they leave. Not five minutes later, I realize that it's actually Thursday I work and not Friday. I call the resident office yet again and tell them to contact these guys and let them know that I actually need them come Friday. By this time I am wide awake and pissed. I checked my weight and it was up a pound and a half from yesterday!
I am SO SICK and TIRED of having people do this! They call at all hours, work their own schedules, and have little to no consideration for their residents. And worst of all, my weight is suffering for it. I was too tired for the gym yesterday and I am too tired today. I actually fell asleep from 1:30pm to about 5pm, so now I 'll probably be up all night again. I don't know what to do. I can't turn my phone off at night with DH overseas, what if it's an emergency? I also called the store about my washer and dryer delivery, I was told it could be up to 3 weeks and today was 3 weeks with no word. The guy I talk to says he doesn't see anything about it coming in and tells me they should have told me 6 to 8 weeks. WTF? 6 to 8 weeks to have a washer and dryer sent in? How in the hell, why in the hell, would it take that long? I was told a special order clerk would call me back about it today, but no one has, so I guess I'll be calling to bitch again tomorrow. I might just go up there and God almighty if the ones I ordered are in stock, I gonna MAKE them give whatever they have and when mine comes in it's theirs.
It' like 6pm now and I know that I need to go to them gym, I really have to. I need to be home by 8pm to catch the biggest loser (it's about the only show that I'm looking forward to these days and I HATE that they made it an hour shorter to have the stoooopid The Voice results show) until 9pm, then I should should go to the other gym, but I don't know if I have the strength today. I should try to be asleep by 12 or 1 tops too. I felt good to get that all out, but I feel like it's not going to solve any of my problems. Thanks for letting my rant! Dios Mio!
Monday, April 9, 2012
Weekly Weigh In 3
TOM is here this week and I finally had a small whoosh Sunday morning. I hope that the downward trend continues for the rest of the week, I was starting to go a little batty! I lost exactly 2 pounds last week making my 3 week total 7.6 pounds. Only 21 more pounds until my first mini goal! I am determined to get to that point as fast as possible, past experiences tell me that once I get there the going gets really tough. I don't have my book handy at the moment to say how many days I went to the gym last week, but I am guessing 5 out of 7. I did an hour and a half last night and netted a 600 calorie burn according to my body media. I LOVE this thing! It was a great investment and it is really confirming how hard I am working and keeps me on track with my burn totals.
I am scheduled for my first set of measurements on the 15th and I'm curious to see if things are any different. My clothes don't feel much different, so I'm not expecting much, but any nudge down will be appreciated! I think I'm going to do pictures again at some point, but I think I'll do them based on pounds this time instead of months. Maybe one every 20 pounds or so?
Other than that I really haven't been up to much... I basically go to the gym, watch tv, blog, and do it all over again. I'm kinda getting stir crazy, but until DH gets his finances back on track there really isn't any fun money. It's ok though, I think it's kept me more focused on the weight loss. I have been MIA from the bestie for the last week and even though I feel kinda bad for not being around, it is keeping me from over indulging. I know I have to learn at some point how to control my eating and know when to say it's time to leave and hit the gym, but I don't think I'm quite ready for that yet.
I have developed a rather annoying tooth problem though and wonder if any of you have experienced the same thing... Apparently as far as I can tell, my back molar has migrated backward and created a small gap between it and the second to last molar. I noticed that I was getting a lot of food stuck back there and being afraid of cavities and rot and all, I started flossing it constantly and picking at it to get all the food unstuck. Well now it hurts and I'm not sure if it's because I injured the gum tissue picking at it or if I possibly made it worse and forced food up under the gum? I called my dentist office to inquire about an appointment and they are booked until the 19th, but I have a cleaning appointment on the 23rd, so I decided to wait the extra 4 days and have them look at it then. I hope it's not a serious issue. I've never had an abscess or any gum disease, just cavities, so I'm kinda spazzing about it. To stand on my soapbox for a minute, I am disgusted by the fact that I have had so many cavities in recent years. I went from birth to age 16 with perfect dental health and then all of a sudden every two years or so I need a filling! What gives? I brush twice a day, floss most days (yeah I'm guilty of not always doing that, but I NEVER flossed as a kid and I was golden), and genuinely take good care of my teeth. Are some people bound for dental trouble no matter what they do? Anyway, I pray that it's just irritated from me picking at it and that there is some easy fix for the problem.
I am scheduled for my first set of measurements on the 15th and I'm curious to see if things are any different. My clothes don't feel much different, so I'm not expecting much, but any nudge down will be appreciated! I think I'm going to do pictures again at some point, but I think I'll do them based on pounds this time instead of months. Maybe one every 20 pounds or so?
Other than that I really haven't been up to much... I basically go to the gym, watch tv, blog, and do it all over again. I'm kinda getting stir crazy, but until DH gets his finances back on track there really isn't any fun money. It's ok though, I think it's kept me more focused on the weight loss. I have been MIA from the bestie for the last week and even though I feel kinda bad for not being around, it is keeping me from over indulging. I know I have to learn at some point how to control my eating and know when to say it's time to leave and hit the gym, but I don't think I'm quite ready for that yet.
I have developed a rather annoying tooth problem though and wonder if any of you have experienced the same thing... Apparently as far as I can tell, my back molar has migrated backward and created a small gap between it and the second to last molar. I noticed that I was getting a lot of food stuck back there and being afraid of cavities and rot and all, I started flossing it constantly and picking at it to get all the food unstuck. Well now it hurts and I'm not sure if it's because I injured the gum tissue picking at it or if I possibly made it worse and forced food up under the gum? I called my dentist office to inquire about an appointment and they are booked until the 19th, but I have a cleaning appointment on the 23rd, so I decided to wait the extra 4 days and have them look at it then. I hope it's not a serious issue. I've never had an abscess or any gum disease, just cavities, so I'm kinda spazzing about it. To stand on my soapbox for a minute, I am disgusted by the fact that I have had so many cavities in recent years. I went from birth to age 16 with perfect dental health and then all of a sudden every two years or so I need a filling! What gives? I brush twice a day, floss most days (yeah I'm guilty of not always doing that, but I NEVER flossed as a kid and I was golden), and genuinely take good care of my teeth. Are some people bound for dental trouble no matter what they do? Anyway, I pray that it's just irritated from me picking at it and that there is some easy fix for the problem.
Thursday, April 5, 2012
Mumble Grumble
I've been really good this week, I've been to the gym 3 days (twice one day) and have been staying on target with my calories. I feel like slamming my head into the wall though because I am not losing any weight, in fact I am up about half a pound since Sunday. I've hit plateau's before so that's nothing new, but never this soon! I am usually pretty consistent at about 3ish pounds a week until I get down in the 150s. It's kind of sad that I've been there and done that enough times to know... anyway though, I am sooo frustrated! I still believe that sleep is my issue. I'm averaging around 80% sleep efficiency at a pitiable 5 hours a session. I am one of those people that simply cannot take naps and yesterday I was so exhausted upon waking that only 2 hours later I was out on the couch for 5 hours! What do you know though, those whole 5 hours I got 100% efficiency... It's a little after 9pm now and I am determined to be in bed my midnight, I don't care if I have to throw myself into a wall to pass out. Well, maybe not that extreme, but you get where I'm headed with this.
I know that eventually with all the hard work I'm doing there has to be a whoosh somewhere along the line, but I having a really hard time getting over the fact this is happening so soon. I also worry that my efforts are wasted, I know they aren't but it's hard to overcome that thinking. Do the pounds that we lose due to lack of sleep catch back up with us eventually? Or are they gone forever in the fact that our bodies missed out on having that all important healing time? I actually tried looking for answers on the subject, but the Internet is diluted with so much weight loss fodder it's impossible to navigate. Here's to hoping I'll have a whoosh soon and reclaim my motivation.
I know that eventually with all the hard work I'm doing there has to be a whoosh somewhere along the line, but I having a really hard time getting over the fact this is happening so soon. I also worry that my efforts are wasted, I know they aren't but it's hard to overcome that thinking. Do the pounds that we lose due to lack of sleep catch back up with us eventually? Or are they gone forever in the fact that our bodies missed out on having that all important healing time? I actually tried looking for answers on the subject, but the Internet is diluted with so much weight loss fodder it's impossible to navigate. Here's to hoping I'll have a whoosh soon and reclaim my motivation.
Sunday, April 1, 2012
Weekly Weigh In 2
Well this week I only lost 1.8 pounds, I am not happy with that, but I am content considering I had a big loss last week. I also know that I haven't given my all yet, so anything downward is good. This puts me a pound behind for the week so I really have to get my shit together this week. Now that my house is entirely clean (aside from the mountain of clothes I'll be washing when the new appliances arrive) I will definitely have more of a decluttered brain! The next big project will be getting my sleep schedule down, I really don't know how to approach this. How do you reset yourself to wake up at 9am, when you struggle to go to sleep before 4am? I know from using my body monitor that I am already not getting enough "restful sleep" with my average sleep efficiency at 82% for the last 2 weeks and I know it's effecting my loss. I'll figure something out I suppose... That's all for now, I have to get to the gym soon!
Monday, March 26, 2012
Old Habits, New Reflections
I just spent the last half hour re-reading my blog entries from last year around this time. I thought I was at the same place that I was last year, but I'm wrong. I am about 10 pounds heavier this year. How'd that happen? Really? As I was reading I came across a lot of habits that I am currently still displaying, Goodnuff recently posted about "teaching and an old dog new tricks", I need to learn some new tricks too. When I'm bored- I eat. When I'm stressed I eat. When I don't have anything else to do- I eat. I eat when I'm hungry, I eat when I'm when I'm not. I eat when I'm happy, I eat when I'm sad. The only common denominator is that, well I eat. I need to relearn my body to only eat when I need to eat or else I'm never going to get to my goal and stay there. How many times have I lost the same 20 pounds and gained them back only to try to lose them again? How many times could I have been done by now?
I had a fail today. I am at the besties house babysitting for her and I was tasked to make dinner. Simple enough, I brought my own food and snacks so it shouldn't have been a problem. So I'm making dinner and I'm kinda hungry, but I can't eat my dinner before the kids do so what do I do? I look in the cabinet and see what's in there. Chips! Wow, I never have chips at my house. It won't hurt to indulge in a few. A few turns into a mindless munch session, hark yet! Another bag of a different flavor, lets try these too... munch munch munch. Wait, o'er yonder way, is that a bag of marshmallows? And close at hand a jar of nutella? My my, I've never had nutella though I've heard wonderful things. Let's give that a try. Wow, that IS good, munch munch munch... I was full before dinner was done. Whenever I come here there are so many things that I don't allow in my house that my eyes grow wide and I can't stop myself. How do I overcome that? I knew what I was doing, but I didn't care. Now I'm sitting here a belly full of sugar and carbs, over calories for the day, and a full 8 hours before I'll be in bed. Oh yeah, and 10 pounds heavier than this time last year. At what point do we learn those new tricks? I can't keep doing this, I have got to make food my ex-best friend.
Any suggestions?
I had a fail today. I am at the besties house babysitting for her and I was tasked to make dinner. Simple enough, I brought my own food and snacks so it shouldn't have been a problem. So I'm making dinner and I'm kinda hungry, but I can't eat my dinner before the kids do so what do I do? I look in the cabinet and see what's in there. Chips! Wow, I never have chips at my house. It won't hurt to indulge in a few. A few turns into a mindless munch session, hark yet! Another bag of a different flavor, lets try these too... munch munch munch. Wait, o'er yonder way, is that a bag of marshmallows? And close at hand a jar of nutella? My my, I've never had nutella though I've heard wonderful things. Let's give that a try. Wow, that IS good, munch munch munch... I was full before dinner was done. Whenever I come here there are so many things that I don't allow in my house that my eyes grow wide and I can't stop myself. How do I overcome that? I knew what I was doing, but I didn't care. Now I'm sitting here a belly full of sugar and carbs, over calories for the day, and a full 8 hours before I'll be in bed. Oh yeah, and 10 pounds heavier than this time last year. At what point do we learn those new tricks? I can't keep doing this, I have got to make food my ex-best friend.
Any suggestions?
Weekly Weigh In
This week was a week of new beginnings. I didn't do my best, but I did a hell of a lot better than I have in a while. I went to the gym twice and tried to stay active at home as well. I completed a few major tasks around the house and have been sticking to my diet plan as well. This weigh in I have lost 4.4 pounds! I'm not surprised since it's my first week really back on it, but I know that I'll have to work extra hard this week to keep up the pace. Hope everyone is doing well, I've been reading but haven't had the time to post any thoughtful comments. I'm still getting my head together, but I'm definitely making progress. Good luck this week ladies!
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
3FC Followers Please Read
I'm posting here to comment to any 3FC follower:
I don't know what's wrong with the site, I can log in and post, but cannot comment on any of your blogs. I know that several of you are having issues too. If you haven't received any comments recently it's probably because we can't get them to go through. I have been following everyone as usual Jewlz, Jelbelle, Patty, & more, but commenting has become impossible. If any of you see this just want you to know that people are reading. Jewlz, I know you have been especially frustrated with it and fear losing your blogging material. I see you wrote that you also have a tumblr blog... is it possible for you to export your blog from 3FC (or import from tumblr) to send it to tumblr? Or another blog site? I vaguely remember Didi (Bits of String & Sealing Wax) posting something about importing/exporting before, at least I think I did... Maybe someone can leave a comment to shed some light of this for everyone. I've found that here at blogspot things are really easy to navigate and customize and offers a lot of extra features that wordpress does not. I have never used tumblr though so I can't offer any input there. I love blogspots following options too, as I can see everyone's blog that I follow from one page and know immediately as they update- No more random clicking around to see who's posted, YAH! In any event, just wanted you all to know that I'm still reading. Hopefully it will be fixed soon or some of you will start blogs on other sites. Updates later, Pepa
I don't know what's wrong with the site, I can log in and post, but cannot comment on any of your blogs. I know that several of you are having issues too. If you haven't received any comments recently it's probably because we can't get them to go through. I have been following everyone as usual Jewlz, Jelbelle, Patty, & more, but commenting has become impossible. If any of you see this just want you to know that people are reading. Jewlz, I know you have been especially frustrated with it and fear losing your blogging material. I see you wrote that you also have a tumblr blog... is it possible for you to export your blog from 3FC (or import from tumblr) to send it to tumblr? Or another blog site? I vaguely remember Didi (Bits of String & Sealing Wax) posting something about importing/exporting before, at least I think I did... Maybe someone can leave a comment to shed some light of this for everyone. I've found that here at blogspot things are really easy to navigate and customize and offers a lot of extra features that wordpress does not. I have never used tumblr though so I can't offer any input there. I love blogspots following options too, as I can see everyone's blog that I follow from one page and know immediately as they update- No more random clicking around to see who's posted, YAH! In any event, just wanted you all to know that I'm still reading. Hopefully it will be fixed soon or some of you will start blogs on other sites. Updates later, Pepa
Falling off Sucks
Not feeling too much like blogging so this will be a short one tonight. Big news! I went out and purchased a couple of nice things for the house, 1) a really cute breakfast nook set for half off at a going out of business sale and 2) I placed the order for a new washer and dryer! I'm extremely excited about the new washer and dryer, my old dryer went *boom* a few months ago and the washer is an old 6 cycle beast so it's going to be a real treat to have brand new appliances. Plus I can wash the massive piles of laundry that I've been dreading to take to the laundromat. It should be delivered within 4 weeks tops because the one I wanted was out of stock- no biggie though just something to look foward to. The nook set I think will stay in the box until we move somewhere smaller. Right now we have a large table with a leaf that probably won't fit into a small apartment- which I'm banking we'll move to next go around. I also got a lot of other odds and ends errands completed and am starting to feel less brain cluttered.
Forgot to mention when I went to buy groceries Sunday I had a huge win! There was my absolute favorite guilty pleasure bakery fudge on clearance for .99 cents (regular 4.99) and I resisted all temptation to buy it! HUGE WIN in my book! Tonight I broke out the kinect for the first time and played "Your Shape Fitness Evolved"... it kicked my ass and I'm so ashamed. It wasn't even hard exercise and I only did it for about 30 minutes. It really goes to show just how long I've been out of the gym and getting out of shape. For those of you that don't know, when you use Xbox Kinect it displays your body on the tv and sometimes does real video of yourself for play back and such- OMG I. AM. HUGE. I'm trying my best to not make this demoralizing, but it is no matter how many ways I try to look at it. I was really fit last summer and here I am 10 months later a fat slob that can barely do the step touch with out getting winded- what happened??? Do we really lose our fitness that fast? It actually motivates me to really go for this balls out now, but I'm really daunted by how hard this is going to be.
Forgot to mention when I went to buy groceries Sunday I had a huge win! There was my absolute favorite guilty pleasure bakery fudge on clearance for .99 cents (regular 4.99) and I resisted all temptation to buy it! HUGE WIN in my book! Tonight I broke out the kinect for the first time and played "Your Shape Fitness Evolved"... it kicked my ass and I'm so ashamed. It wasn't even hard exercise and I only did it for about 30 minutes. It really goes to show just how long I've been out of the gym and getting out of shape. For those of you that don't know, when you use Xbox Kinect it displays your body on the tv and sometimes does real video of yourself for play back and such- OMG I. AM. HUGE. I'm trying my best to not make this demoralizing, but it is no matter how many ways I try to look at it. I was really fit last summer and here I am 10 months later a fat slob that can barely do the step touch with out getting winded- what happened??? Do we really lose our fitness that fast? It actually motivates me to really go for this balls out now, but I'm really daunted by how hard this is going to be.
Monday, March 19, 2012
Headed in the Right Direction
Today I managed to get off the arse and go to get my healthy groceries! I also reorganized the kitchen cabinets and put away all the things I know I won't or shouldn't eat. I found quite a bit that will go bad before DH comes home so I think I'll post it free on CL for some one in need. I also was miffed to find that I had some freezer burnt chicken and turkey in the freezer. How the hell did that happen? Have I really not cooked a decent meal at home in that long? I truly do believe that this animal was not meant to have a job outside of the home, it seems like when I do things go to shit around here.
I also went out and bought the gel pens and notebooks for my food journal. I got a new "diary" and a day planner as well. I like to keep a diary while DH is on deployment, it gives me a way to stay organized and to remember important things. I'm sure one day when we're old I'll enjoy reading it too. I re-did some calculations since I'm behind now and it seems that the best plan is to aim for 3 pounds a week until June, and then scale back to 2 pounds a week for the rest of the time. I know that as I get smaller it will be harder to lose, so it actually works out well to give myself that jump. 3 pounds is a hefty goal for a gal my size to keep up with for that many weeks still and I know that I need to get started right away. By next Sunday I should be 180.6 or less for my first goal.
After I finish here I am going to eat a salad and then do some more cleaning. I've managed to get the living room in "living" status and I organized the kitchen, but still need to finish in there. I should send Safire a plane ticket and have her come mop my floors, she LIKES cleaning. If you see this you are completely welcome to come and take care of mine for me! :) Actually reading her posts about vacuuming and getting up to clean motivate me in a way, it makes me WANT to WANT to do it, lol. My bestie just got a nice new sectional sofa today and it looks amazing. I don't know if it's just the fact that her house is more modern or what, but I think their decor looks so much better. I really makes me want to just throw all my junk out and start over! I'll have to take pictures one day and let you guys give me some arrangement tips. I really want to redecorate, but DH thinks that we shouldn't get anything new while he's in the military because It'll just get messed up in the move. My only problem is, will we be able to afford it when he's out? My guess is no. He is one of those men that don't see a problem with hodgepodge furniture or dull drapery... sigh.
Not really anything else to say tonight, I should get moving so that I can play with the kinect tonight and burn some calories. Wish me luck!
I also went out and bought the gel pens and notebooks for my food journal. I got a new "diary" and a day planner as well. I like to keep a diary while DH is on deployment, it gives me a way to stay organized and to remember important things. I'm sure one day when we're old I'll enjoy reading it too. I re-did some calculations since I'm behind now and it seems that the best plan is to aim for 3 pounds a week until June, and then scale back to 2 pounds a week for the rest of the time. I know that as I get smaller it will be harder to lose, so it actually works out well to give myself that jump. 3 pounds is a hefty goal for a gal my size to keep up with for that many weeks still and I know that I need to get started right away. By next Sunday I should be 180.6 or less for my first goal.
After I finish here I am going to eat a salad and then do some more cleaning. I've managed to get the living room in "living" status and I organized the kitchen, but still need to finish in there. I should send Safire a plane ticket and have her come mop my floors, she LIKES cleaning. If you see this you are completely welcome to come and take care of mine for me! :) Actually reading her posts about vacuuming and getting up to clean motivate me in a way, it makes me WANT to WANT to do it, lol. My bestie just got a nice new sectional sofa today and it looks amazing. I don't know if it's just the fact that her house is more modern or what, but I think their decor looks so much better. I really makes me want to just throw all my junk out and start over! I'll have to take pictures one day and let you guys give me some arrangement tips. I really want to redecorate, but DH thinks that we shouldn't get anything new while he's in the military because It'll just get messed up in the move. My only problem is, will we be able to afford it when he's out? My guess is no. He is one of those men that don't see a problem with hodgepodge furniture or dull drapery... sigh.
Not really anything else to say tonight, I should get moving so that I can play with the kinect tonight and burn some calories. Wish me luck!
Sunday, March 18, 2012
Staring at my Brain
I feel like for the last few days I've been staring at my brain trying to will it to work. I finally feel back to normal as far as my stomach bug went, but I still can't seem to get motivated to begin. I've outlined before that I am a huge planner, without a plan I am lost. I feel like I can't get my brain into planning mode to get this ball rolling now. I am going to attempt to use this an a "flowing outlet" to get a plan set in stone.
Right now I'm on a backward schedule with me going to sleep around 7am and waking around 6pm, that needs to be modified a bit to at least get me up by 2pm or 3pm so that I can still run errands. I'm a night owl and I might as well embrace it and be happy while I can right? I don't really see the harm when it seems to be the rhythm my body wants anyway. Seeing how it is 3:30am now, I should be asleep by 5am to be awake by 3pm. Tomorrow my plan needs to be to go to the commissary and buy some healthy groceries to start supporting my diet. I also think I'm going to go a step further and box up all the food that I know I should not eat or will not eat (boxes of rice-a-roni, cans of tomato sauce, etc) so that my cabinets are open to fill with healthy foods. At least this way I can visually see when my healthy options are running low and I'll know that it's time to make a new shopping list. Before I go tomorrow I need to make a list, that means making a diet plan...
I already know that my calorie limit needs to be 1200 per day, so I need to plan my meals accordingly.
Safe Foods:
Salads with light dressing
Deli meat sandwiches with no mayo or cheese
Lowfat popcorn
Fiber bars
Light soups
Yogurt
Cottage cheese
Healthy microwave dinners
Oatmeal
Skim milk
Steamed veggies
Chicken breast
That's a pretty good list to start with I think. I need to dig up some of my old food journals to make sure I'm not leaving out anything that I have used in the past. I also need to re-train myself to eat every two hours. This has done wonders for my metabolism in the past and also helps to keep me disciplined in my eating. I also need to go buy a shiny new food journal to start fresh and a pack of gel pens. I think that I can definitely start back on my healthy diet if I follow through with the above tomorrow.
How to start back going to the gym? Just do it? I wish it were that easy to overcome. Today I had planned on going, but I ended up doing some unimportant shit on the computer and watching 2 hours of "My Strange Affliction" on 20/20. I don't have cable so if an interesting show comes on "regular tv" I can usually talk myself out of doing whatever to catch it in the name of "how often does interesting shit come on regular tv"-dom. And now I'm realizing that I'm truly having a problem getting motivated, so I'm here blogging instead of hitting the 24 hour gym. Now considering that I need to be in bed in an hour ( it's now 4:00am) in order to re-adjust my schedule so that I can go get healthy food, I don't have time to go to the gym and should be making my grocery list and or cleaning out my refrigerator.
The next biggest factor in success for me is getting my house in order. I have frequently talked about this lately as well and it seems like it just isn't staying done. Believe it or not it was all done with the exception of my bathroom and our spare room, but then DH had to pack -that really messed more than you can imagine up. Combine that with me working the week before he left and then with the fact that I was throwing clothes everywhere each night that we went out and then he left and I got sick and WHAM! a big ass mess again. I am really going to get rid of a lot of shit this summer, I can feel it in my bones! I need to focus on cleaning tomorrow more than anything else, because I know once it's done I won't have anything mentally valid left to hold me back. If I can validate it, I can use it. If I can't then I won't, I'm at least honest with myself.
On the health front I'm eating an drinking as normal again and there isn't anymore puke or diarrhea so I'm good to go there. The annoying thing is I came out of this illness 3 pounds heavier than I began- ain't that some BS? I'm hoping it's just my body saying thank God you're eating again and that it will come off in a day or two. As of now I am 183.8 starting my journey almost a week behind schedule, this is going to suck, but it has to happen. I will update again after I have accomplished everything in my day ahead. Wish me luck and will my fat ass into the gym!
Right now I'm on a backward schedule with me going to sleep around 7am and waking around 6pm, that needs to be modified a bit to at least get me up by 2pm or 3pm so that I can still run errands. I'm a night owl and I might as well embrace it and be happy while I can right? I don't really see the harm when it seems to be the rhythm my body wants anyway. Seeing how it is 3:30am now, I should be asleep by 5am to be awake by 3pm. Tomorrow my plan needs to be to go to the commissary and buy some healthy groceries to start supporting my diet. I also think I'm going to go a step further and box up all the food that I know I should not eat or will not eat (boxes of rice-a-roni, cans of tomato sauce, etc) so that my cabinets are open to fill with healthy foods. At least this way I can visually see when my healthy options are running low and I'll know that it's time to make a new shopping list. Before I go tomorrow I need to make a list, that means making a diet plan...
I already know that my calorie limit needs to be 1200 per day, so I need to plan my meals accordingly.
Safe Foods:
Salads with light dressing
Deli meat sandwiches with no mayo or cheese
Lowfat popcorn
Fiber bars
Light soups
Yogurt
Cottage cheese
Healthy microwave dinners
Oatmeal
Skim milk
Steamed veggies
Chicken breast
That's a pretty good list to start with I think. I need to dig up some of my old food journals to make sure I'm not leaving out anything that I have used in the past. I also need to re-train myself to eat every two hours. This has done wonders for my metabolism in the past and also helps to keep me disciplined in my eating. I also need to go buy a shiny new food journal to start fresh and a pack of gel pens. I think that I can definitely start back on my healthy diet if I follow through with the above tomorrow.
How to start back going to the gym? Just do it? I wish it were that easy to overcome. Today I had planned on going, but I ended up doing some unimportant shit on the computer and watching 2 hours of "My Strange Affliction" on 20/20. I don't have cable so if an interesting show comes on "regular tv" I can usually talk myself out of doing whatever to catch it in the name of "how often does interesting shit come on regular tv"-dom. And now I'm realizing that I'm truly having a problem getting motivated, so I'm here blogging instead of hitting the 24 hour gym. Now considering that I need to be in bed in an hour ( it's now 4:00am) in order to re-adjust my schedule so that I can go get healthy food, I don't have time to go to the gym and should be making my grocery list and or cleaning out my refrigerator.
The next biggest factor in success for me is getting my house in order. I have frequently talked about this lately as well and it seems like it just isn't staying done. Believe it or not it was all done with the exception of my bathroom and our spare room, but then DH had to pack -that really messed more than you can imagine up. Combine that with me working the week before he left and then with the fact that I was throwing clothes everywhere each night that we went out and then he left and I got sick and WHAM! a big ass mess again. I am really going to get rid of a lot of shit this summer, I can feel it in my bones! I need to focus on cleaning tomorrow more than anything else, because I know once it's done I won't have anything mentally valid left to hold me back. If I can validate it, I can use it. If I can't then I won't, I'm at least honest with myself.
On the health front I'm eating an drinking as normal again and there isn't anymore puke or diarrhea so I'm good to go there. The annoying thing is I came out of this illness 3 pounds heavier than I began- ain't that some BS? I'm hoping it's just my body saying thank God you're eating again and that it will come off in a day or two. As of now I am 183.8 starting my journey almost a week behind schedule, this is going to suck, but it has to happen. I will update again after I have accomplished everything in my day ahead. Wish me luck and will my fat ass into the gym!
Thursday, March 15, 2012
Strings of Events
I had fully intended on posting long before now, but things have been really hectic and I haven't had time or energy to write it all out. Where to begin? DH left on Tuesday and he had off Sunday and Monday before that so we tried to spend as much time as possible together before he left. We went to see John Carter, went out for dinner a few times, got ice cream, visited friends, and just stayed with each other. We talked a lot about how things went down last time and made some resolutions to make things different this go around. I felt and feel good about it this time.
On Monday night we were lying in bed around midnight and my stomach started hurting. I had experienced a similar pain the night before and cured it with Tums, so I thought it was some type of gas again. I ignored the pain for a bit, but then I knew it was coming... I puked all night. Probably 6-7 times, it was awful. I haven't been that sick in YEARS. I woke up the next day with a queasy tummy but was hopeful that I was better. Wrong! I then started on massive diarrhea... it sucked bad... I was going to the toilet every 20 minutes. I didn't eat anything all day and when I tried taking Pepto and drinking I puked again. I wasn't even able to go with DH to the airport. It had to be one of the worst experiences of my life, helpless I had to watch him drive away and knew I couldn't see him off. I still think I'm in a little bit of shock that I wasn't able to go to the airport with him.
I just layed in bed all day Tuesday and on Wednesday I woke up feeling 80% better, but still kind of yucky. I only ventured out to take a cab to the airport to retrieve DH's car and that wasn't until 10pm. I ate 2 pieces of toast and drank a lot of Gatorade all day. I was able to keep that down, so then I ate a small tv dinner. I slept again and this morning (Thursday), I woke up to a (yes, I'm going there) shart in my undies. Holy shit, we really do fart in our sleep! I'm going to burn those drawers when I feel better. Now I am back to diarrhea and fear eating for it will surely escape in liquid form. Now I'm kind of afraid to drink too, because face it who wants to have diarrhea for 3 days? I have went through 3 big rolls of toilet paper and a whole pack of wet wipes!
Needless to say I have not done anything productive and feel down right weak. I'm about to attempt eating and drinking, but If I wake up to more liquid shit tomorrow I'm going to the ER for fluids and not even going to attempt to use my digestive tract. Thank God I stopped throwing up though, I have a really small nasal/throat cavity and when I puke it comes out my nose and gets trapped in my sinuses and it thoroughly disgusting. I think that's why I have developed an iron stomach for fear of puking!
DH has arrived safely at his destination, I have talked to him twice since he left through IM and he got his phone turned on so at least now that is available. He has indoctrination the next 2 days and then I assume will start work Monday, maybe Sunday. He got put in a better living situation than last time with higher ranking enlisted, but he is farther from his treatment facility and the cab rides will be expensive (about $40 each way) so he is pondering asking to move to the other building where he can walk, but the young and restless that are housed there may pose a problem to his recovery. I just pray that he will be happy and healthy this time around.
I'd write more, but I think it's time to run to the loo again, sigh.
On Monday night we were lying in bed around midnight and my stomach started hurting. I had experienced a similar pain the night before and cured it with Tums, so I thought it was some type of gas again. I ignored the pain for a bit, but then I knew it was coming... I puked all night. Probably 6-7 times, it was awful. I haven't been that sick in YEARS. I woke up the next day with a queasy tummy but was hopeful that I was better. Wrong! I then started on massive diarrhea... it sucked bad... I was going to the toilet every 20 minutes. I didn't eat anything all day and when I tried taking Pepto and drinking I puked again. I wasn't even able to go with DH to the airport. It had to be one of the worst experiences of my life, helpless I had to watch him drive away and knew I couldn't see him off. I still think I'm in a little bit of shock that I wasn't able to go to the airport with him.
I just layed in bed all day Tuesday and on Wednesday I woke up feeling 80% better, but still kind of yucky. I only ventured out to take a cab to the airport to retrieve DH's car and that wasn't until 10pm. I ate 2 pieces of toast and drank a lot of Gatorade all day. I was able to keep that down, so then I ate a small tv dinner. I slept again and this morning (Thursday), I woke up to a (yes, I'm going there) shart in my undies. Holy shit, we really do fart in our sleep! I'm going to burn those drawers when I feel better. Now I am back to diarrhea and fear eating for it will surely escape in liquid form. Now I'm kind of afraid to drink too, because face it who wants to have diarrhea for 3 days? I have went through 3 big rolls of toilet paper and a whole pack of wet wipes!
Needless to say I have not done anything productive and feel down right weak. I'm about to attempt eating and drinking, but If I wake up to more liquid shit tomorrow I'm going to the ER for fluids and not even going to attempt to use my digestive tract. Thank God I stopped throwing up though, I have a really small nasal/throat cavity and when I puke it comes out my nose and gets trapped in my sinuses and it thoroughly disgusting. I think that's why I have developed an iron stomach for fear of puking!
DH has arrived safely at his destination, I have talked to him twice since he left through IM and he got his phone turned on so at least now that is available. He has indoctrination the next 2 days and then I assume will start work Monday, maybe Sunday. He got put in a better living situation than last time with higher ranking enlisted, but he is farther from his treatment facility and the cab rides will be expensive (about $40 each way) so he is pondering asking to move to the other building where he can walk, but the young and restless that are housed there may pose a problem to his recovery. I just pray that he will be happy and healthy this time around.
I'd write more, but I think it's time to run to the loo again, sigh.
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
3FC Bloggers
3FC seems to be having a lot of problems lately, I couldn't comment on any of my favorite bloggers over there. If you guys read this, know we still want to read and comment but the site has a programming error (or so says my microsoft thingy).
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
Bump...
Sorry I've been absent the last couple of days, I've had a ton going on. DH really wants me to snuggle him tonight so I'll have to catch up commenting tomorrow. Have a good bloggy day!
Monday, March 5, 2012
So Tired!
The last couple of days have been SOOO long! I had to close the last 2 nights and tomorrow I'm there until 8:30pm, so I might as well be closing. We had a huge shipment at work today that came only an hour before the other employee left for the day, so I spent 4 hours unboxing crap rushing like hell to get it done so I could clean the place up. I think that's a big reason why I'm so tired of retail, I'm tired of cleaning up after other messy slobs. I have to do enough of that at home, do I really want to do it at work too? Or maybe it's the other way around, I do it so much at work that I despise it at home? Tonight was compounded by the fact a lone straggler moseyed on it at 8:44pm and guess what? This woman was either drunk or high on pills or something. SHE. WOULD. NOT. LEAVE. or take a hint. I tried all the tricks in the book and she kept forgetting which shoes she was trying on, she kept trying on the wrong size and when I'd keep reminding her to go to the right size she'd pick up something else to try on. NIGHTMARE! Then she wanted to look at shoes for her kids... all 4 of them! I told her the register was going to shut off, that went over her head. I turned off the music, I don't think she noticed. She didn't check out until 9:33pm (I'm supposed to be done with the money and locked up at 9:15pm) and you want to know what she does? Spends another 5 minutes looking at coupons on her cell phone, then when I hand her the recipet she says, "What time do you close?" I tell her 9pm. She says, "Oh man, do you know what time it is?" I tell her 9:39p. She says, "Are you salaried?" I say no. She says, "Why didn't you tell me you were closed, I would have kicked me out of here." I tell her, honestly we aren't allowed to tell customers that we are closed, they think it's bad for our image. I wanted to murder her, she wasted about 45 minutes of my life stumbling around messing up my cleaning, talking to me about jibberish and how "some bitch" needs to stop texting herabout getting home because she's loaning her $160.00 and the least she can do is watch her kids for a minute. GOD I HAD TO RANT ABOUT THAT! I wish I could have filmed that shit so everyone could see just what I was dealing with, uhg, only one more night then I have the next 3 off! Then I work saturday, then one day a week for the next 2 or 3 weeks and then I'm done. I seriously haven't been more ready.
Sunday, March 4, 2012
Just a Day in the Closet
Just wanted to post to stay in the habit of doing it everyday whether I feel like it or not. Today I was off work and stayed in bed until 3pm, then got up and cleaned and organized our bedroom. I LOVE having a clean bedroom. Usually after about a week of cleanliness it starts reverting to a pig sty with clothing on the floor, shoes placed haphazardly in the walkways, movies & remote controls strewn on the night stands, jewelry spilling out of their boxes and scattered about. I attribute it all to being so rushed day to day, I have on several occasions been in such a rush to get ready that I rip all the clothes off the hangars and throw them on the floor because I can't find the one shirt I want to wear in my overflowing closet. Why is it overflowing you say? 1) Because I'm female and I like pretty things. 2) Because I have a clothes, shoe, & accessory addiction. & most influencing, 3) Because I have a full wardrobe of Mediums, Larges, Extra Larges, 2XL's, 8-10's, 10-12's, 12-14's, 14-16's, one size fits all, one size fits most, 8's, 9's, 10's, 11's, 12's, 13's.... need I continue? If I actually got down to 120 I seriously get rid of most of what I own and start fresh, with one size, that would be a dream come true! I am going to get my camera and start my photo-journaling soon and I think one of the first things I'm going to post will be my closet! That's all for now folks, got work in 7 hours! 'Night!
PS: Created the new page "Weight Stats" located up top to track my weight and inches. I have already posted my starting inches and will comment more on that subject in my next post.
PS: Created the new page "Weight Stats" located up top to track my weight and inches. I have already posted my starting inches and will comment more on that subject in my next post.
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Six Month Challenge
As time starts ticking away I know it's time to get my plan together and set my goals for the next 6 months. I have some lofty goals and some pretty intensive challenges for myself. I am a very time oriented person, I like to know how my time will be spent and how much extra of it I will have for other things. I need to learn how to condense my daily activities to workout, run errands, do household chores, *self-pamper, and still have **free time. *Self-pamper is considered any activity that I normally skip due to time constraints, examples; exfoliating scrubs, straightening my hair daily, putting on lotion, painting my nails, dressing up, etc. **Free time is considered any activity not planned; web-surfing, tv watching, reading, calling relatives, etc. As it is I struggle to ever do anything nice for myself because everything else comes first, this soon will change. I want to spend this time re-learning how to structure my life and relax. I'm don't reflect a high strung personality on the outside but the truth is inside I'm wound tight mess! The last time I went to the massage therapist he told me (referring to my back shoulder area) "It's like you have steel cables in here." Does that sound like someone in a relaxed and stress free state? I need to learn to take back control of my life and take care of me. With all that said, here are the goals:
Weight Loss & Fitness:
I want to lose 60lbs, yes 60lbs, over the next 180 days. That averages out to 0.3 lbs per day or about 2.3 lbs per week. That is a weekly burn of 8050 calories + (insert calories eaten per week). My resting metabolic rate or RMR (amount of calories burned by doing nothing but living and breathing) is roughly 1,300 calories. I plan to stick to a 1,200 calorie per day diet plan, meaning that I must burn approximately 1007 calories a day additionally through exercise to reach my weekly goal of 8050 calories expended. Did you catch all that? I hope I explained it well. Simply put, I need to burn 1,000 calories a day through exercise while eating no more than 1,200 calories per day. The EATEN - RMR - BURN = -8050 DEFICIT. The calorie DEFICIT divided by 3,500 (amount of calories in a pound) = 2.3 lbs
I know I can do this, I used to burn 800 calories (tracked with my heart rate monitor) by strength training for about 45 minutes, elliptical for 45 minutes, and recumbent bike for 30 minutes. Even if I'm too tired to do anything else I can always keep pedaling that bike for awhile longer to push my 1,000. I'll switch out the strength training on certain days for something else, probably by slowly dying jogging on the treadmill or playing with the kinect. 10 lbs a month isn't a too large goal, but it's hard enough to keep me from being complacent I think. I'm figuring that my daily total workout time plus travel will be around 3 to 3.5 hours, plus my gym has tanning and red light therapy so I'll more than likely do one or the other each day making my total around 4 hours.
I had to go back through my old 3fc posts to figure out how much weight I'd gained and how fast. It seems that on/around June 15th I weighed approximately 154lbs, two months later on August 20th I had gained (which I attributed to the DH madness) to 162lbs, next around October 15th (I know for a fact because I was weighed after I had my miscarriage) I weighed 174.0 (and was quite upset about my gain). After the miscarriage I truly stopped all attempts at weight loss or tracking because of the holidays and circumstances which led me to 190 lbs around January 1st this year (O.O) , I have since dipped down to 184.0 and am hovering in this area. This morning I weighed 182.8 lbs. It averages out to me gaining about 4 pounds a month, I am currently 28 lbs heavier than I was when he can home last time. Dios mio, the progress that I have negated. I certainly haven't worked out any near the way I was last summer, so all the tone I gained is gone along with my strength. I can't fit most of my summer clothes and I really only have a couple pairs of jeans that fit, barely at that. I'm also disturbed at how much larger my lower stomach and hips have gotten. For example, I have this pair of dress pants that I bought in Florida when we first moved there in 2010, I know for a fact that I weighed 183 at that time because I signed up for Curves while there and that was my start weight. When I bought those pants they fit like a nice slack, fitted in the hip and a little loose on the thighs. Now when I put them on I can barely button them and my stomach pooch is so big I have to wear a long top to cover it up. Same weight but my lower tummy is huge! When I lost weight last summer and put those pants on they were so loose I could pull them out in front about 6 inches. I really truly wonder if the miscarriage triggered some "mom gene" in my body and caused this new weight distribution, it's scary!
All that said, when I lose 60 lbs, I'll be 120 lbs by mid-September. I know 120 is very small and its a lofty goal, but I am only 5'3- 120 is supposed to be a mid-range weight for my height. Also, by setting a big goal I feel like I'm more likely to push harder to reach it. Sure I'll be a little disappointed if I don't make it there, but I'll be thinner for trying I'm sure. I am going to re-measure myself again tonight and start a weight and measurement page, I know I'll do tracking, but I haven't decided how often. I got a new scale for Christmas that measures muscle mass, fat, bmi, and visceral fat. I know I'm going to track those numbers weekly and I will post all that on my weight stats page as well. Now that I've given you all the lowdown on my plan, I'm going to break it down and add a few miscellaneous goals in. These are my initial thoughts for the next 6 months, I'm sure I'll add a little bit here or there, but this is the bulk of what I want to accomplish for now.
Goals & Lifestyle Changes:
Lose 60 pounds by September 15th, 2012 to weigh 120 pounds.
Lose 50 inches off the tracked areas of my body
Wear a size 6 in jeans
Drink 120+ ounces of water a day
Burn 1,000 calories a day
Take a picture for photo-journaling everyday
Email DH everyday
Do something nice for myself everyday
Drink more coffee and less diet soda
Take a multivitamin everyday
Complete household overhaul
Make time every week to sew and read
Organize all my old film photos and album them
Pay off my auto loan
Save at least $4K
Did I mention that DH now believes they are leaving on the 13th, instead of the 16th? That leaves us only 10 days, 5 of which I am obligated to work. Sometimes the Navy life really really sucks.
Weight Loss & Fitness:
I want to lose 60lbs, yes 60lbs, over the next 180 days. That averages out to 0.3 lbs per day or about 2.3 lbs per week. That is a weekly burn of 8050 calories + (insert calories eaten per week). My resting metabolic rate or RMR (amount of calories burned by doing nothing but living and breathing) is roughly 1,300 calories. I plan to stick to a 1,200 calorie per day diet plan, meaning that I must burn approximately 1007 calories a day additionally through exercise to reach my weekly goal of 8050 calories expended. Did you catch all that? I hope I explained it well. Simply put, I need to burn 1,000 calories a day through exercise while eating no more than 1,200 calories per day. The EATEN - RMR - BURN = -8050 DEFICIT. The calorie DEFICIT divided by 3,500 (amount of calories in a pound) = 2.3 lbs
I know I can do this, I used to burn 800 calories (tracked with my heart rate monitor) by strength training for about 45 minutes, elliptical for 45 minutes, and recumbent bike for 30 minutes. Even if I'm too tired to do anything else I can always keep pedaling that bike for awhile longer to push my 1,000. I'll switch out the strength training on certain days for something else, probably by slowly dying jogging on the treadmill or playing with the kinect. 10 lbs a month isn't a too large goal, but it's hard enough to keep me from being complacent I think. I'm figuring that my daily total workout time plus travel will be around 3 to 3.5 hours, plus my gym has tanning and red light therapy so I'll more than likely do one or the other each day making my total around 4 hours.
I had to go back through my old 3fc posts to figure out how much weight I'd gained and how fast. It seems that on/around June 15th I weighed approximately 154lbs, two months later on August 20th I had gained (which I attributed to the DH madness) to 162lbs, next around October 15th (I know for a fact because I was weighed after I had my miscarriage) I weighed 174.0 (and was quite upset about my gain). After the miscarriage I truly stopped all attempts at weight loss or tracking because of the holidays and circumstances which led me to 190 lbs around January 1st this year (O.O) , I have since dipped down to 184.0 and am hovering in this area. This morning I weighed 182.8 lbs. It averages out to me gaining about 4 pounds a month, I am currently 28 lbs heavier than I was when he can home last time. Dios mio, the progress that I have negated. I certainly haven't worked out any near the way I was last summer, so all the tone I gained is gone along with my strength. I can't fit most of my summer clothes and I really only have a couple pairs of jeans that fit, barely at that. I'm also disturbed at how much larger my lower stomach and hips have gotten. For example, I have this pair of dress pants that I bought in Florida when we first moved there in 2010, I know for a fact that I weighed 183 at that time because I signed up for Curves while there and that was my start weight. When I bought those pants they fit like a nice slack, fitted in the hip and a little loose on the thighs. Now when I put them on I can barely button them and my stomach pooch is so big I have to wear a long top to cover it up. Same weight but my lower tummy is huge! When I lost weight last summer and put those pants on they were so loose I could pull them out in front about 6 inches. I really truly wonder if the miscarriage triggered some "mom gene" in my body and caused this new weight distribution, it's scary!
All that said, when I lose 60 lbs, I'll be 120 lbs by mid-September. I know 120 is very small and its a lofty goal, but I am only 5'3- 120 is supposed to be a mid-range weight for my height. Also, by setting a big goal I feel like I'm more likely to push harder to reach it. Sure I'll be a little disappointed if I don't make it there, but I'll be thinner for trying I'm sure. I am going to re-measure myself again tonight and start a weight and measurement page, I know I'll do tracking, but I haven't decided how often. I got a new scale for Christmas that measures muscle mass, fat, bmi, and visceral fat. I know I'm going to track those numbers weekly and I will post all that on my weight stats page as well. Now that I've given you all the lowdown on my plan, I'm going to break it down and add a few miscellaneous goals in. These are my initial thoughts for the next 6 months, I'm sure I'll add a little bit here or there, but this is the bulk of what I want to accomplish for now.
Goals & Lifestyle Changes:
Lose 60 pounds by September 15th, 2012 to weigh 120 pounds.
Lose 50 inches off the tracked areas of my body
Wear a size 6 in jeans
Drink 120+ ounces of water a day
Burn 1,000 calories a day
Take a picture for photo-journaling everyday
Email DH everyday
Do something nice for myself everyday
Drink more coffee and less diet soda
Take a multivitamin everyday
Complete household overhaul
Make time every week to sew and read
Organize all my old film photos and album them
Pay off my auto loan
Save at least $4K
Did I mention that DH now believes they are leaving on the 13th, instead of the 16th? That leaves us only 10 days, 5 of which I am obligated to work. Sometimes the Navy life really really sucks.
Friday, March 2, 2012
Beautiful Day Today!
The temperature got up to 80 today in Virginia and seeing as how DH will miss out on the whole summer we took the chance to barbeque. I asked him what he wanted and he said, "Hot dogs, Keilbasa, and chicken... oooh ooh and macaroni and cheese pie." I obliged since it's what he wanted and he won't get too many more home cooked meals before he leaves. I of course, sampled everything, but didn't over do it. I am not even going to attempt to figure out how many calories I had though, so I'm giving my self a do-over on starting my new lifestyle today. I AM however, starting tomorrow because I didn't buy any junk at the grocery store and I've pretty much eaten any junk that was lying around already. I'm praying that the left over bbq doesn't temp me, I'm honest to God not a big meat person, but I LOVE chili dogs. Grew up on them and I know how to make banging hot dog chili!
*Serious TMI alert for all bloggers who haven't followed me previously, NOTE: I will pretty much share anything, we're all human right? And considering that I started as a weight loss blogger I'm not stranger to discussing fun bits like bowel movements and their shapes, colors, etc* Speaking of eating habits and all, OMG... I have had the WORST... GAS... of my life this week! It could clear rooms, peel wallpaper, or wilt flowers and I have no idea what's causing it. The only thing I've eaten that's new to me are Kudos bars, but I haven't had one of those in like 2 days and I'm still the stinky kid off Charlie Brown. It's mostly at night too and I'll seriously rip one every 10 minutes for like 3 hours. When I crawled into bed last night at about 3:30am I woke DH up and he got up to go to the bathroom- whilst he was relieving himself, I let one and when he opened the door and came back in all I heard was, "Uhhuhhmmph..." and he turned around and walked out. LOL, this shit is serious... I hope it clears up soon, until then beware I am a huge fire hazzard. *END TMI*
Also found out that DH's family are not going to make it this weekend after all, their trip was delayed and now they won't be able to squeeze us in. I'm sad for them and DH, but it did take a huge load off my shoulders. So tonight instead of cleaning like crazy I was able to spend time with DH and relax. I have to work a short shift tomorrow and then I'll be off Saturday to finish any chores around here. My last offical day is the 10th, but I offered to my boss to work 1 day a week for a couple of weeks so she can have a day off while she trains the newbies. It'll be on my terms though since my notice will be fulfilled and it feels pretty stress free knowing that. Don't think I mentioned it, but DH is working 12hrs days every day with no day off until further notice. It really sucks knowing it's so close and he has to work. They really don't pay these guys enough for all the psychological stress they have to put up with. I wanted to write a post today about my plan for this summer and my ideas for the blogs, but I think I'll have to save that for tomorrow now, well at least after I wake up today. Night, P
*Serious TMI alert for all bloggers who haven't followed me previously, NOTE: I will pretty much share anything, we're all human right? And considering that I started as a weight loss blogger I'm not stranger to discussing fun bits like bowel movements and their shapes, colors, etc* Speaking of eating habits and all, OMG... I have had the WORST... GAS... of my life this week! It could clear rooms, peel wallpaper, or wilt flowers and I have no idea what's causing it. The only thing I've eaten that's new to me are Kudos bars, but I haven't had one of those in like 2 days and I'm still the stinky kid off Charlie Brown. It's mostly at night too and I'll seriously rip one every 10 minutes for like 3 hours. When I crawled into bed last night at about 3:30am I woke DH up and he got up to go to the bathroom- whilst he was relieving himself, I let one and when he opened the door and came back in all I heard was, "Uhhuhhmmph..." and he turned around and walked out. LOL, this shit is serious... I hope it clears up soon, until then beware I am a huge fire hazzard. *END TMI*
Also found out that DH's family are not going to make it this weekend after all, their trip was delayed and now they won't be able to squeeze us in. I'm sad for them and DH, but it did take a huge load off my shoulders. So tonight instead of cleaning like crazy I was able to spend time with DH and relax. I have to work a short shift tomorrow and then I'll be off Saturday to finish any chores around here. My last offical day is the 10th, but I offered to my boss to work 1 day a week for a couple of weeks so she can have a day off while she trains the newbies. It'll be on my terms though since my notice will be fulfilled and it feels pretty stress free knowing that. Don't think I mentioned it, but DH is working 12hrs days every day with no day off until further notice. It really sucks knowing it's so close and he has to work. They really don't pay these guys enough for all the psychological stress they have to put up with. I wanted to write a post today about my plan for this summer and my ideas for the blogs, but I think I'll have to save that for tomorrow now, well at least after I wake up today. Night, P
Thursday, March 1, 2012
Insomniac
No matter what, I can never go to sleep before midnight. It's usually not before 3 am most nights, are there a lot of people out there like this? I have to leave for work in 7 hours- thats LEAVE, not wake up lol. I have tried all sorts of things, tylenol pm, simply sleep, valerian root, melatonin, exercise, warm milk, dimming lights, narcotics, etc... The only thing that ever really put me to sleep was a muscle relaxer and darvocet and it's not like I can take those nightly to sleep with! Hell, they recalled darvocet because it apparently causes heart problems, I used to take that stuff for migranes, maybe I'll have a heart defect one day and we can call one of those tv laywers... "If your hurt, he'll come to you. Call Joel Bieber..." He, he, he, I've always wanted a reason to see if those dudes are as cheesy in real life as they are on tv, does anyone else see "Lowell the "Hammer" Stanley" on their tube? LOL
I think "night-owl-ism" is an inherited disease. My parents were night owls, I was a night owlet. My dad worked 3rd shift most of my childhood and I had a tradition that I would give him a kiss bye everynight right before he walked out the door. That means I was still awake at 11pm waaaay back then and I still had to get up at 6am to go to school. I wonder if all that research is legit about kids preforming better with more sleep- I was an honors student 3.8, I'm just saying here... My bestie thinks I'm a nut because I don't go to sleep with DH at night, I actually "tuck him in" with a kiss everynight by 9pm since he has to be up by 5am. I guess what feels so natural to one person might seem odd to someone else, but for me, I sleep when I can not when I want to. He complains that I don't snuggle him often enough, but we've been together long enough for him to know I can't help it. I don't think I'm too odd on this, but what do you think?
Can't believe how fast time is going by, it's Thursday already- another week almost done. Sixteen days until he leaves. Oh, I don't think I mentioned before but he will be gone at least until September maybe longer depending on the state of the world- this wasn't a planned mobilization as it is. I should go since I have to work and at least try to sleep tonight.
I think "night-owl-ism" is an inherited disease. My parents were night owls, I was a night owlet. My dad worked 3rd shift most of my childhood and I had a tradition that I would give him a kiss bye everynight right before he walked out the door. That means I was still awake at 11pm waaaay back then and I still had to get up at 6am to go to school. I wonder if all that research is legit about kids preforming better with more sleep- I was an honors student 3.8, I'm just saying here... My bestie thinks I'm a nut because I don't go to sleep with DH at night, I actually "tuck him in" with a kiss everynight by 9pm since he has to be up by 5am. I guess what feels so natural to one person might seem odd to someone else, but for me, I sleep when I can not when I want to. He complains that I don't snuggle him often enough, but we've been together long enough for him to know I can't help it. I don't think I'm too odd on this, but what do you think?
Can't believe how fast time is going by, it's Thursday already- another week almost done. Sixteen days until he leaves. Oh, I don't think I mentioned before but he will be gone at least until September maybe longer depending on the state of the world- this wasn't a planned mobilization as it is. I should go since I have to work and at least try to sleep tonight.
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